It isn't considered polite to ask a lady her age.
But I might be able to tell you how old she is.
I'm Santa's Grumpy Elf.
You want to know how old Mrs. Claus is right now? You want to know what age she is? Well, I don't like to ask her how old she is. After all, if someone asked me my age I'd be even grumpier!
The short answer is that Mrs. Claus is 1,136 years old.
(But don't tell her I told you, because then I won't get any more of her divine mince pies for a month!)
The longer answer is that Mrs. Claus is just 1,136 years, 11 months, 24 days, 1 hour and 19 minutes old!
(And there's even more to that long answer if you keep reading!)
(But I don't think she looks a day over 1,000!)
I really don't know why you want to know exactly how old Mrs. Claus is, but, if you really must know, I think:
In years, Mrs. Claus is 1,136 years old! (But she has the heart and soul of a 100 year old!)
In months, Mrs. Claus is 13,644 months old! (But the months fly by when she's around!)
In days, Mrs. Claus is 415,274 days old! (And day-in-and-day-out she runs the North Pole!)
In hours, Mrs. Claus is 9,966,577 hours old! (When you're with her every hour seems like a second!)
In minutes, Mrs. Claus is 597,994,639 minutes old! (Now you're just being mean!)
In seconds, Mrs. Claus is 35,879,678,381 seconds old! (Well, she does make every second count!)
Mrs. Claus is a bit modest about their age. And Santa tries to respect that.
When you email Santa, he often answers that
he stopped counting his birthdays when he turned 550 years old. Sometimes he will just say
I am as old as my nose and a wee bit older than Mrs. Claus! He doesn't want to make her feel bad
that she's married to someone as old as Santa is!
(He didn't learn that from this Grumpy Elf I'll tell you!)
Mrs. Claus started life as a normal little girl. Just like Santa, she became well-known for helping others. She was also known for standing up for women. Santa and the Christmas Spirit won her heart as she got older. I think it is her Christmas Spirit that keeps her ageless.
Even though I'm a grumpy elf, Mrs. Claus means the world to us elves. But don't tell her I said that; I'm supposed to be a grumpy elf!